Here is us wondering “Kaun hai ye log? kahan se aate hai ye log?” after looking at all the people who do these SUPER annoying things.
Aap chronology samjhiye
So I understand with series like FRIENDS (which people have watched fully ek-do baar and then they randomly stream episodes for fun) but what’s with the people who can watch any episode of any season of any show (that they’ve not watched before)? Matlab, character, story, climax, kuch idea hi nahi hai par maza khoob aa raha hai. Uff, questions kese nahi aate dimaag mein?? A friend legit told me “Haan yaar Office dekha hua hai beech beech se kaafi saare episodes” WOW,
Let your emojis out
ALSO, people who never use emojis while texting.. are you ok? who hurt you? Pathhar ke bane ho? how am i supposed to read your tone through texts? Are you happy? Are you secretly plotting your murder? How would i know! sorry to break it to you, but emojis na use karne se tum CEO @ Maturity nahi ban jaaoge bye.
Why are you the way you are
Aur yeh kya hai kuch logon ka??? Kuch bhi khate hai??? Chalk, paper, patti, sab kuch? Bhai Homo Sapien ho ya fir Gaaye? Kaun ho tum? Yeh kesa thrill hai? Kya tumhe kitanu se ekdum darr nahi lagta? Kya tumhari body natural Savlon hai? Kyunki tumhe kuch bhi dikh jae, tumnhe voh cheez taste karni hoti hai. Whyyy??? Bahut sawal hai mere paas. Bhoot.
My last two brain cells hurt
A normal person would address this phone number as seven six five three zero four two eight nine, but legends address this phone number as seven hundred and sixty five, three thousand and seventy four, twenty eight, nine. Bhai, yeh kya kar diya??? I was to just asking for your number. Yeh konse tangent mei aa gaye hum? kyun mere pyaare se brain cells ko pareshan kar rahe ho? FREAKSHOW.
What is this doodh behavior?
I. WILL. NEVER. UNDERSTAND. PEOPLE. WHO. HAVE. THANDA/ LUKEWARM. DOODH. WITH. MALAI. I mean really, it feels weird. It tastes weird. It is weird. Your doodh loyalties will make you my mom’s favourite but not mine. SORRI.
Have some lajja pls.
Or btw, yeh ice cream khane ka fayda kya hai agar aapko usko custard banana khana hai, hain??? Matlab achha khaasa dessert which is supposed to be eaten when frozen but nahi, melted khane mein kick milti hai. Aapko kick milni chahiye. (Special kicks for people joh 15 desserts ka bhurta bana ke khate hai. Have you no sharam and lajja?)
I’m up for adoption
And yeh COLD drink ko WARM peene ka kya sense hai bhai? Especially meri mummy, “haanji, coca cola de dijiye, but room temperature”, areeeyyyy, room temperature pe fizz weird sa lagta hai. Please, again have you no sharam, no lajja?
Dil se bura lagta hai bhai. pls.
I WILL SAY THIS ONCE AND YOU BETTER GET IT. Paper faadne ka ek and sirf ek tareeka hota hai, that is folding it and then tearing it off from the crease. Yeh blindly paper tear karne waale log (who most of the time get portions from a different page along with the page they were tearing) mujhe kabh samajh nahi aaenge. Special mention to the sad, innocent page that comes off from the end of the notebook when you tear something from the beginning of the notebook.
*machine gun like laughter*
And the platter of annoying harkatein comes to reality when someone burps butter chicken into your face. Or make bubbles with straws from a drink, ORR DRAG THEIR FEET or SCRATCH THEIR NAILS ON PAPER to make that “zizizi ziade” noise. If you know, you know.
Itna irritating? Janice ho kya?