Confessions Of A College Senior
For a generation who grew up watching movies like Mai Hoon Na, Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na, Student Of The Year, Fukrey, Dil Dosti etc, It’s no wonder students build up monumental expectations from their college life. They begin to believe that college life is supposed to be one grandeur epic drama when life unfolds and everything falls into place, when you have the most incredible and unforgettable time with your real friends, when for once in your life you know what you’re supposed to do and if you’re lucky enough, you also get to find the person you want to spend your life with.
Yeaaaaaaaaah, about that, no, not really, that doesn’t happen…….. AT ALL.
Let’s get to the biggest Lies Every Student Is Told Before They Join College:
“College mei zyada padhayi nahi hoti”
Oh my sweet summer child! If you’re going to college next month thinking that’s true, you’re in for the biggest shock of your life. To give you a little hint; not only do we have a never ending syllabus, but we also have stressful internships and college projects. What I’m trying to say is, welcome to the real life, it sucks, you’re gonna love it!
“You scored 90+% in school, you will do great in college”
If you think you’re going to ace your college semester exams just because you scored 95% in boards or because you have a ton of academic certificates or because your teachers thought you were a unique snowflake, just wait for a while, somebody’s gonna say “Haha, april fool banaya bada maza aaya” anytime now.
“You will find your real friends in college”
Let’s face it we all go to college expecting to find Anjali to our Rahul, Raju & Farhan to our Rancho, Sanju to our Ram. But it won’t take much time for you to go from “I’m gonna find real friends in college” to “Real friends? can I catch them on Pokemon Go?”. Don’t get me wrong, you’ll find so many great people in college, you will have good times but you need to lower down your expectations.
“Attendance doesn’t matter in college”
If you’re sick, you are going to college. If it’s raining outside, you are going to college. If there’s a flood, you’re going to college. Apocalypse? sorry, you’re going to college. Because if you don’t go to college, not only you will be unable to understand anything in most of the later lectures but you also won’t make the attendance cut, which is compulsory 75% in most of the colleges in India. Yep, good luck bunking your lectures, mate.
“Bas acche college se degree le lo, job toh yu hi mil jaayegi”
I’m sorry to burst your little bubble but it doesn’t matter what college you are from, interviewers are gonna laugh at your college degree regardless. But sure, going to a “good college” has a lot of perks, like you get to see so many cool people you are never gonna talk to, so many societies you’re never gonna join, so many expensive delicious food items you’re too broke to buy. And about “Job toh yuhi mil jaayegi” ah, well, let’s try to keep you a little hopeful about that. *coughs* not gonna get it *coughs*
“College mei toh full on aish and party with friends”
Yes, of course, you will go out and party with your friends like in those bollywood movies… when you’re not busy maintaining your 75% college attendance, or when you’re not busy working with your college societies, or when you’re not busy completing your college assignments, or when you’re not busy doing internships. Of course you will go out! and when you do, which seemed like super exciting and fun in first few weeks, will plummet down to just going to friend’s house and using their wifi. Yep, pretty much it.
“There’s no homework in college”
Yes, about thaaat, it’s the most brutal of all the lies they told you about college life. Brace yourselves, because you’re going to get a ton of assignments and in most colleges, you actually get marks for them. Sigh. It’s okay, guys, it’s okay. We’re all in this together. *group hug*
“All the text books in college are required”
Abort! mission abort! if your professor tells you to buy a certain expensive book or says it’s only available in the college book store, don’t fall for it. It’s a trap! for most cases, assignments or internet will work fine for you, but if you do need them, you can get the books online at a very cheap rate. You’re welcome.
“College ki ladkiyan” (specific to guys)
Short horror story: and then sometimes people join engineering colleges.